But during this time I've really been thinking, feeling, reading and talking about prayer. Prayer sort of feels sacred to me, a connection you make with that something or someone that is divine, that is the force behind all that is.
But alas, this space where I'm at with this subject has been quite a journey.
Growing up my parents weren't particularly religious. My dad was and is a Catholic and my mum was a Protestant. Church wasn't part of our routine, not being in a formal church.
But we did have our ritual, we wouldn't have called it that though. On Sunday evenings we would go for a family walk. My mum loved to walk and so on Sunday afternoon, off we would go, my mum, my dad and myself. We would just walk around our neighbourhood and talk and look at the nice houses (insert ohhh and ahhh here), we would talk, hold hands and that was nice.
8 years later, I was about 13 my parents got divorced. And my mum went into "search" mode. I think she felt lost, as you maybe do when you leave your life partner.
We visit soooooooo many churches. We went to all sorts of Churches were I think my mum was looking and praying for her "family". Whilst most Church communities were welcoming I don't think my mum found her family. Mostly because your family are around you and inside you. They are a part of you, I think and feel that they are always with you. But we are always so busy searching, looking outside of ourselves for fulfilment (I just noticed that word has fill in it!!). Prayer for me is being in nature, walking, taking a moment to be grateful. That's prayer for me, connection, feeling, remembering my true nature.
I think my mum's family was in her heart, soul, and also I believe that she found in it nature. She and I like to walk. In nature. And that is where I find God, that's my prayer.
Next post I'll dive into how I find God in the Indian God's and Goddesses.
Kisses to you.